Notes on Watching the Nashville Symphony

Few things are more beautiful than watching someone do something with their whole heart. That is passion.

This performance is beautiful, exquisite. I saw a man in the audience a few minutes ago who didn’t know what to do with his hands, exercising self-restraint, enthralled by the sound he was hearing… He was having trouble waiting until the end to give his applause.

An applause is all we have to give. It is the grand finale, and yet, they are not performing for an applause.

They have done this many times before, perfectly, with the same passion.. With no applause waiting for them at the end.

I’ve come to the conclusion that their performance must be for something greater than an applause.

 

It seems when you do something with your whole heart,
Void of vain conceit,
That
joy begins to smear itself… and blurs the lines between practice and performance until it all begins to feel the same.

And then, one day, when your heart is consumed with passion, the applause that was once the aim becomes the backdrop, a faint sound in the distance.

 _________________________

What burns in your heart? What is that thing you’d do if no one was watching? …If everyone was watching? Passion that’s not taught or learned, but a fire that grows from the inside out, is what we crave. 

“And whatever you do, do it heartily [wholeheartedly, sincerely, genuinely, warmly, profoundly, with all one’s heart], as to the Lord and not to men…” Colossians 3:23

 

A Secret to Joy

Over the past year, there’s only been one book, besides the Bible ;), that’s kept my attention long enough for me to (almost) finish it. That book is called One Thousand Gifts and it’s by a woman named Ann Voskamp. Her writing is raw, eloquent, and captivating.

I had a pretty rough year (yep, being engaged/married doesn’t fix all of your problems… However, having someone there who loves you with their whole heart does make the journey from pain to wholeness easier), and only the essentials (Jesus, His Word, and God-appointed relationships) made the cut in my life. You learn to get back to the basics: being thankful for every sunrise, salvation, and God’s love. My lofty revelation for the year was probably just that I need Jesus, every day.

Anyways, I felt pretty numb and empty on and off for quite some time. It felt like I couldn’t “do” enough to fix myself… and the truth is, I still can’t. And neither can you. Only God can do that.

Long story short, I thank God today because I can truly say that He has delivered me from so much heaviness. His joy is truly my strength and I know that He can heal the deepest wounds and reach the darkest places in us, in anyone. My heart is for the people whose hearts are full of pain and nobody knows. It is the world we are living in… whether it’s a homeless woman or a wealthy man in a suit: pain is universal. And yet, God’s love is greater… Anyone who calls on Him will be saved in the whole sense.

Thank you GOD for Your love and mercy!

I asked but never searched

Wandered but never dug 

For answers and sometimes

for anything at all 

 

I begged but never thanked

Cried out but never waited 

 For a sign and sometimes

for anything at all

 

To all the places that I’ve been

where I didn’t think You were

and all the moments I’ve spent wondering

when You were always sure,

 

I’ve opened my eyes to see that You 

weren’t so hidden after all. 

 

No, not so hidden after all. 

Inspired by a quote from One Thousand Gifts:
“The secret to joy is to keep seeking God where we doubt He is.”